tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post2761235235196570845..comments2024-02-23T08:34:49.655-08:00Comments on My Tango Diaries: Out of BalanceMarihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08960763038363579526noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post-26547096647104668992010-04-07T15:47:37.885-07:002010-04-07T15:47:37.885-07:00A wise woman once said to me, 'Honey, there is...A wise woman once said to me, 'Honey, there is no balance, only boundaries.' It was a bit of a revelation to me since balance is a very fleeting thing.<br />I have been in a non-tango partnership for 16 years and have two kids under six. My tango community knows that I have only so much time to spend on tango and don't expect me to go to everything. I have to prioritize my tango activities. <br />In saying this I have been at this tango/life balance thing for over 12 years so am not in the first blush of true love with tango.<br />Good luck and let us know how you manage.Kirrahttp://www.tangocorazon.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post-11178890721636125172010-04-07T11:16:45.029-07:002010-04-07T11:16:45.029-07:00@tangocherie - priorities are exactly what it come...@tangocherie - priorities are exactly what it comes down to - that, and accepting that I have limited resources (time, energy, money everything) and I have to make choices. I kept thinking at some point it would all fall into place and I'd be able to do it all. It just doesn't work that way.<br /><br />@aa - that was the realization I had too. At the milonga, I (mostly, lol) knew that I needed to take responsibility when I hurt someone accidentally - physically or emotionally. I wasn't taking that responsibility home. My focus was always "you don't just don't understand." or "Why won't you enjoy this with me?" My life got too compartmentalized. I'm getting the impression this happens a lot. :)<br /><br />@Johanna - I'm so glad to hear from you. I was wondering where I was on that list of tango stages. I can't find the link anymore - but I hit "Selective" pretty abruptly. I think it's natural for relationships to go through a sort of renegotiation of terms periodically, I just hadn't shown up to the table to even talk about it. :/ I'm glad to know that there's hope for the tango and non-tango-dancing couple. :DMarihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08960763038363579526noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post-74258312282921000282010-04-07T10:14:37.589-07:002010-04-07T10:14:37.589-07:00LOL, Mari! You are right on track, schedule-wise,...LOL, Mari! You are right on track, schedule-wise, with Tango. After about a year or two, we suddenly wake up and realize that everything, EVERYTHING, in our lives has be tangofied: our wardrobe, our music, our thought processes, our friends. And because of what we have learned from tango, we realize we need to rebalance our lives.<br /><br />I will not lie: it is tough. I'm in a 13+ year relationship with someone who does not dance Tango...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post-76190051279609576182010-04-07T06:41:53.236-07:002010-04-07T06:41:53.236-07:00Mari,
You touch so many topics that are close to...Mari, <br /><br />You touch so many topics that are close to my heart. And this one comes especially close. I have had the same realisation recently - after many months of mostly ignoring even my dearest and dedicating every spare moment to my new-found addiction. In fact, I was even justifying this by saying it's their choice.<br /><br />I have recently realised I need to strike a difficult balance, and it's my job to do that - and I must stop penalizing people for not being part of my passion!<br /><br />-aaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5370884568160752646.post-57703547533769851182010-04-07T06:30:39.569-07:002010-04-07T06:30:39.569-07:00Mari, you're describing what happens to many p...Mari, you're describing what happens to many people: there just isn't time enough to do it all and to do it well. Generally we have to choose our priorities. Eat, sleep, work, love, family, tango--how much more can we do?tangocheriehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10012220622641996877noreply@blogger.com