From a previous post's comments (thank you Happyseaurchin for the post topic):
"In the post, you mention the distinction between sensual and sexual. I have that distinction too, and I was wondering if you could elaborate on some future post. Many people I speak to don't seem to be aware of this, and I was wondering how that was "wired" into your being...? I presume your partner is not threatened by your tango exploits, precisely because of this distinction? Whether I have been in a relationship or single, the experience of this distinction is ever present. Your observation of your own experience in this matter would be most appreciated."
This will be my fourth draft on this topic. It's such a difficult thing to write about and feel like I'm conveying what I mean to convey. I've tried twice before, here and here. And I still don't think I've done the topic justice.
I have told people this frequently, but until they experience it for themselves, it won't make any sense. Tango, the music and the dance, is both intimate and universal. Tango asks us our secrets, but not our name. We can reveal so much, certainly at times more than we intend to, that there is almost an understanding that crossing lines without invitation puts the freedom to express ourselves at risk.
Ninety-nine percent of the time the overtly sexual aspect is simply not relevant whereas the sensual aspect is absolutely everything. Does that make sense? I suspect that the fact that I'm married makes my situation different than if I were single. (And you are correct in assuming my non-tango dancing husband is very supportive of my dancing, and thankfully not threatened by it.) There is nothing to prove to me - I'm not looking for more than the dance. I've been told that takes some of the pressure off. Maybe that's the case and it changes things. It's really hard for me to know from my side of the embrace.
To me, in this dance we are constantly communicating with one another. There is a line that, once it's crossed - when the feeling goes from sensual to sexual, creates a very different conversation.
And this is only my experience, which is limited of course to where I dance, how long I've been dancing, and with whom I dance. My tango world is quite small, and maybe naive.