My Tango Diaries

Apparently, entering an elevator in a slinky dress, stiletto heels and fishnet stockings, without luggage, does not immediately make the other passengers on the elevator think "tango dancer". At least I wasn't wearing "over the knee" boots . . . (start around 2:35)

The Tango Festival A few days of living a fantasy tango life, for me it was a (short) milonga life. Eat, dance, sleep, dance. Repeat. Dancing with friends, old and new. Dancing with strangers. Unfamiliar music, and old favorites. The fiercest, raciest Pugliese tanda I've ever danced - was that really me? Hair in my face, breathless, heart racing - flying over, and yet still sinking into, the dance floor . . . yeah, that was me. A Hugo Diaz song that seared my heart and made me feel like I was dancing several inches into the ground. (That feeling of rough, wet soil under your feet, sinking a little, surrounding your toes, holding you to the earth . . . that's what Hugo Diaz feels like for me . . . ) Heart-melting vals sets, Joyful milonga tandas that pushed away every care and worry. The freedom to dance and dance and dance until I could hardly stand up. But the world, my non-tango life, marched on. It knew I would have to come out some time. Thank you to Dearest, Darlingest Hu

I forced myself to wait for quite awhile before posting this. As it turns out, time isn't making me less annoyed, so here goes. For some reason (or maybe many reasons), I am simply infuriated by this: From Sherpal1 on Tango-L, "[To Michael] ...you are absolutely correct...woman show no sense of taste or discrimination...and it perpetuates the existence of clowns in a community...women need to know it is better not to dance than to dance poorly...i know of no other commodity that is consumed endlessly regardless of taste, excellence, value, expertise, effectiveness besides dance... woman just want to dance and they accept any old bone ....women need to bring their sense of consumerism to the dance floor and only accept the dance of a man that is their equal or better ....practicas are where a woman can assist an inferior dancer to be better. I do not want to seem harsh here, only to encourage women to stop rewarding bad leads with a dance...." There are so many problems w

Does your expression match your words? (Picture courtesy morguefile.com ) There's been some great discussion going on around the blogs and tango forums about teaching - when to teach, best practices etc. And it's provided a lot of thoughtful material. I have strong opinions on the subject, but since I'm not a tango teacher, I wanted to wait and think on it for awhile before jumping in with my two cents as a student/consumer and as a trainer. I've mentioned in previous posts that in my former life as a makeup artist, I was a trainer for many cosmetic lines. I was also a trainer who trained trainers. I use that knowledge absolutely every day, and when I forget the lessons I learned in that environment, I'm almost always sorry for it. What I Learned Training Trainers: Everyone is Listening The last cosmetic retailer I worked and trained for had no commission structure. We were a team of 22 people selling every line (theoretically) without favor. I learned to maint

I finally took a pre-milonga mini class with different local tango teachers, who tend to teach (though not always) open embrace, and more nuevo-style moves. They may classify things differently, but when the pattern you're teaching includes a few sacadas, a gancho and a high boleo, in open embrace - that falls into nuevo for me. The Embrace At first I was a bit excited because our teachers said this class was going to focus on connection. I thought, wow, how did we get so lucky? Then they demonstrated the pattern we were going to learn, and I got confused. The embrace was open, with the woman's left hand on the man's right tricep. We were to keep our arms (on the closed side of the embrace) relaxed but firm, and close to our sides so we could feel the "connection". When I felt awkward trying to maintain the embrace, the leader told me that I should really try to "grip" the man's tricep. The only time I have ever heard the term "grip" in ta

Part 3: Making the Honeymoon Last, for other dancers . . . The Care and Feeding of New Tangueros/as NOTE: I am not a teacher and these are only my thoughts on what appears to work in my own community. I hear a lot of the same advice in other communities, so I'm pretty sure this is pretty applicable stuff. Please feel free to shoot down, comment, argue, debate, add, etc.) 1. From the very beginning, let them know the expectations of the community - the etiquette, floor craft, the ways of doing things, resources they can seek out for info on music, on history, on community affairs. Emphasize the community before the steps. The steps aren't going to keep them in tango - the community experience probably will. 2. Dance with them. 3. Spread the word. Talk them up. Introduce them around. For leaders, if appropriate, let them know who might be most likely to accept their cabeceo. (It's really best to check with potential tangueras beforehand.) And make sure they now how to use th

Part 2: Making the Honeymoon Last Get Busy Note: This is about the Austin tango community and I'm told again and again, that Austin is the exception and not the rule. Your community might not be like this. But what if it could be? After I had been in tango for a short while, maybe 9-12 months of going to milongas/classes/workshops dancing 10-15 hours a week, I noticed a fairly sharp decline in invitations to dance. Some gentlemen who had been inviting me pretty regularly seemed to be moving on to the next round of new tangueras and it stung a little bit. I thought it meant that I wasn't new enough (or young enough) to be novel anymore, and not experienced or skilled enough to attract invitations based on my ability. The newer ladies coming in from the University's tango class were about half my age, and looked far better in their stilettos than I looked in my conservative 2.5 " tango t-straps. In short, I was bummed. It took awhile for me to more accurately gauge what

Making the Tango Honeymoon Last - for you, and for other dancers too. Part I: Vignette "At the Crossroads . . ." Maestra: Grande! Grande! (exasperated sigh) You dance too small, too quiet. You hold too much back. Me (looking at my feet and feeling disproportionately defensive by her remark): Well, I get plenty of dances at the milonga. (I admit, not one of my better moments.) Maestra: (sigh) That is because you are simpatico . Despite the sound of it, Maestra was not criticizing me, or giving me a backhanded compliment with that description, however nor was she complimenting me. Her appraisal was almost completely neutral. I thought about that remark for weeks. What did she mean? Was I only getting dances because I was nice? Did she mean my dancing wasn't very good? Was I coasting? Did leaders just feel sort of bad for me and that's why they asked me to dance? Finally I came to a realization about myself and about what tango means to me. If I get danced as much as

From Wikipedia Media under Argentine Tango (Photographer: Christian Aastrup, 2004) Melina Sedo wrote, in the comments on her new blog, "Melina's Two Cents", " . . . please look at youtube-videos of famous dance couples: you'll find lots of rather homely, round or old famous Maestros, but very few of their partners will weigh more than 55 kilos or be elder than 35." I wanted to comment about this since it was mostly the dancers I have listed here, and the several outstanding local tangueras (all over the age of 50) that inspired me not only to start my tango journey, but inspired me when I was feeling down about my dancing. Here are a dozen famous milongueras and teachers all over the age of 35, in various shapes and sizes, dancing all over the world. (I decided to stop at 12 since I ran out of time - there are many, many more.) Maria Nieves Maria del Carmen Marcela Duran , still performing and touring with Forvever Tango Nito y Elba Garcia Neli, Coca, a

There is a very popular belief that, when given the opportunity, tangueros will most often choose the younger, prettier (and often newer) tango dancers over the older, more experienced, or less attractive tangueras at the milonga. After all, the assumption goes, men are more visual, more interested in looks over quality etc. etc. Women, the assumption continues, are more interested in quality over appearance. Is that true? In my (granted limited) experience, sometimes yes, mostly no. That's the problem with generalizations - in the end, they just aren't helpful. They don't provide any real anwers. Assumptions and stereotypes accomplish little more than encouraging negative feelings - about others and about ourselves. "Leaders only want to dance with hot, new 20-something tangueras." "Followers only want to dance with advanced leaders who can help them 'level-up' in their dance." These comments and stereotypes are MOST hurtful to the people who

I know I should post my complete notes on Murat and Michelle's class before diving into something specific (and ranty), but this can't wait. M&M spent a great deal of time and effort, not just talking about etiquette on floorcraft, but demonstrating it. The two concepts I was most happy to hear about were the "male cabeceo" and leaders forming "trains" on the pista. For people who have traveled to Denver and some of the larger tango festivals, this wasn't new information, but it's something that isn't taught very often in our local classes. The male cabeceo - making eye contact (essentially getting approval) from the leader that will be behind you as you enter the dance floor with your partner. More on that from Miles Tangos ( Barefootango.com ): "Leaders when entering the line of dance, make eye contact with the on coming traffic of leaders and acknowledge that you’d like to enter the line of dance and ONLY enter when you have consente

The ever-traveling photographer-tanguero, Neil Liveakos visited our community last month and took lovely photos at our milongas , including some gorgeous ones of Austin Piazzolla Quintet at Esquina Tango , and the one below from our Texas French Bread Restaurant milonga. (For some reason, my favorite pictures of myself are almost always in motion.)

EDIT: I left out two sentences from the reader in BsAs's comment, that I thought I had copied and pasted from drafts, but didn't. I shouldn't publish when I'm so sleepy . . . . I've gotten a tremendous amount of email regarding the last post, and I think you so much for all the feedback, both good and bad. There were a few things I wanted to share from my inbox that I thought might be enlightening, or didn't get addressed in the original post. From reader in BsAs who says, "followers should have no style of their own. Their job is to follow, that's all. (ADDED-->) Many followers say they are expressing the music when all they are really doing is back leading. Tango is not a democracy." I am not a piece of furniture , nor am I deaf . This topic is address rather well in a video here . From P in California, "Are there pictures of you somewhere in a post or something?" I don't know honestly. Maybe. I haven't seen any - at leas

Gavito : "It's tango y nada mas. Tango and nothing else. And that's the tango..." "This is for those who use the Internet for a lot of hanky panky things, okay? If you use the Internet, use for the positive basis of tango, not negatives. Talk about the ones who dance well. Don't talk about the ones you don't like. Ignore them." I know it has always been this way, and this is probably wasted breath, but there is just so much negativity in the discussion of tango when it comes to the issue of styles and embrace etc.. I've reached some kind of critical mass and can't bite my tongue anymore. I am a fairly conservative tango dancer. I strongly prefer close embrace/milonguero/apilado embraces. (Or, as my teacher put it, I just like to be 'buttons to buttons'.) If you lead me a high boleo at a milonga, I'll follow it low and on the floor. It takes a pretty sparse pista to get my heel off the floor. So I'm definitely not one for ad