Skip to main content

More dancing through the scariest things in tango

An update on "Dancing through the scariest things in tango"

Before you start reading this, commit to reading it to the end. I'm writing the bad news first and the good news at the end. But I'll give a preview to the good news -

Dancing tango is worth every bit of it.

Here's the original list from April 13th, 2009

1. Being the least experienced dancer in class. (I missed the first two classes.)

2. Being the last person picked as a partner (in the same class as above. No one wanted to dance with the absolute beginner.)

3. Being the worst (least experienced) dancer at a milonga. The mix is different at every milonga. Sometimes there are other beginners (from your class for example) and sometimes you're the only beginner there. Very rough but worth going!

4. Being dropped after the 1st song in a tanda because you can't keep up with the leader.

5. Being dropped after the 2nd song in a tanda because you can't keep up with the leader. (Does that mean I'm getting better?)

6. Going to milongas by myself - which is almost every time. It's nerve-racking each time it's a new venue, and then I'm over it.

Since then, I've added these:

7. Being the only tanguera not dancing at the milonga. Three leaders not dancing - and me. That gave me a bit of a complex. My mistake: I left early after that. More people, including leaders I dance with frequently, arrived a few minutes after I left. I have never regretted sticking out to the end, so that's my advice to people now. Hang in there. (Actually, my feet might veto that.)

8. Getting corrected harshly (I thought, anyway) in a workshop in front of the entire class. (See My First Tango Workshop Experience)

9. Watching a video of myself and one of my partners dancing. My partner looked wonderful - meanwhile I was doing everything I was told not to do. (Still, this is one of the very best ways to figure out what's really going on in your dance.)

10. Having a leader correct me on the milonga floor, in front of a table of other dancers, and then count through the steps I was "missing". Twice.

Then there's the only moderately embarrassing stuff - like accidentally kicking my partner (he forgave me), kicking myself (really), tripping over my own feet (at least it was in time to the music), and being suddenly unable to follow the basic box step while demonstrating in front of the class.

So if tango has been so scary, why do it at all? Because:

1.) for every disaster there are half a dozen glorious, "I-can't-believe-I-get-to-do-this-every-week" moments, and,

2.) every time something embarrassing happens - there are at least two dancers who come over and commiserate. Everyone has been through this stuff. So instead of feeling isolated, frequently you find new friends that deepen your appreciation of all the wonderful possibilities in the dance. Sounds "Pollyanna", I know. But there you have it.

It's all worth it.

Comments

tangocherie said…
I've been dancing tango for 12 years--and oh! the stories I have!

One night in Nino Bien, my heel caught my crochet skirt and pulled it (way) down, right in front of a table of milongueros!

Once I was dancing with a milonguero much shorter than me, and at the end of the tema, my hoop earring was caught on his nose!

And I could go on and on!

It's all worth it.
Pirou said…
Cherie, those are hilarious anecdotes. One time I pulled up my stockings in the rest room and unknowingly tucked my skirt into the waistband. I went out with my bare behind showing and didn't realize it until a kind girl quickly came and stood behind me and snatched my skirt back out!
Eduardo Castro said…
Caminante no hay camino. Se hace camino al andar.
Mari said…
Tangocherie - you crack me up. The earring thing has almost happened lol! I also lost a hoop earring at some point during a milonga and spent the rest of the time walking around looking like Mr. Clean with my one remaining earring. oops.

Pirou - I live in fear of the pantyhose thing. I did it in a restaurant once, and now I'm practically phobic about that!

Eduardo - thanks for the reminder. great saying. :)
Eduardo Castro said…
Caminante no hay camino, se hace camino al BAILAR!!
Mari said…
Eduardo - exactly!

Popular posts from this blog

Tim Ferriss and the Myth of Tango Mastery

Dear tanguero, I feel I should explain my reaction to your comments about Tim Ferriss. It touched a nerve and I didn't really explain my apparent hostility. It was certainly not meant for you. Several people have brought Tim Ferriss to my attention over this past year. I can usually make it a month before his name pops up again. For readers who are unfamiliar with him, he's the author of "The 4 Hour Work Week". He set a Guinness record for the most consecutive tango turns and has competed with his partner, Alicia Monti, at the Tango World Championship . As a social dancer the idea of a tango competition seems absurd. I don't think I will ever understand how something like tango could be judged - or why anyone would want it to be. But I digress. I think the most crucial detail of Ferriss's history, as I relate it to tango, is his winning Wired magazine's "Greatest Self-Promoter of All Time" . If there is any concept more out of synch with social

Tango solidarity when it counts . . .

Some fellow tanguera-bloggers and I have been having a wonderful online "conversation" via blogs, Twitter, Facebook and email - about the importance of sisterhood and solidarity. You can find Stephanie's post, here and her follow up here , and then Tangocorazon's here . I was so bouyed by the idea of women bonding, helping and supporting each other that I took some things for granted. I took for granted that it would always be easy, enlightened as I am /*cough*/ to be the sort of consistently nurturing and helpful tanguera that I am (in my head) . The truth? Where the rubber met the road (or rather when the discomfort hit the milonga), I wasn't. Here's a little background that gave me a better perspective on the events at the New Year's Eve milonga. These guidelines appear under the heading " Behavior at the Milonga " on Vancouver Island Tango: " . . . The smaller the tango population, the more 'effort' required from each one of th

"Proper" Tango Shoes

Periodically someone, usually a man, will be bring up the topic of "proper tango shoes." If he's referring to the problem (and dangers) of trying to dance in flip-flops, or mules, or platform shoes etc., those are definitely valid, and very helpful points to be made. The likelihood of damaging your feet is very high without the proper support of high quality shoes. My problem comes with the idea that the *only* proper tango shoes have 4" stiletto heels on them and fetish-worthy embellishments. (Okay, I'm pretty keen on the embellishments myself.) "goofy ballroomy shoes are a turnoff... get rid of them..." - Alex Tango Fuego (granted this is from 2007), http://alextangofuego.blogspot.com/2007/10/to-dance-or-not-to-dancebrutally.html And, in the comments on a blog post, Anonymous said... " This is a controversial one. If a follower isn't wearing tango shoes then it's usually a good sign she's not particularly good." From Ms. Hedgeh