Skip to main content

The Beginner

From:  http://www.morguefile.com


The slight, shy leader in front of me had started tango lessons a few months before, dabbled in it a bit, and with many other dances, but within the last month decided to get serious about tango. That night he was attending his first milonga.

I was happy to see him return to tango. When I met him in a class a couple of months prior to that, I was struck by his warmth and gentleness. So when he asked me to dance, I accepted, and told him how happy I was that he was coming out to the milongas. He smiled warmly and embraced me with such tenderness that I was momentarily too surprised to move. Had I mistaken him for someone else? Had we danced socially before and I just didn't remember? Nope - this was the same leader I remembered from the class.

We changed weight for a moment and I decided to risk startling him (which happens sometimes with new leaders), and hold him like we'd been dancing for ages. He embraced me back with the same sense of affection and, most startlingly, relief.

With that, we were off. He walked softly, a little hesitantly, with some rock steps and an ocho cortado or two. The cruzada was still a little bit of a challenge and he took extra time to make sure I was where he thought I was before exiting the step. (I appreciated that.) He tried leading back ochos but when he would have needed to open the embrace to make that work, he adjusted, changed weight and pulled me back in front of him, continuing his walk. I smiled against his cheek, and he smiled back, and patted my back lightly - almost absentmindedly.

Between songs he said, "I tried other things [dances], listened to other music. But this," he pointed to the speakers on the wall, "this is what makes me feel like dancing. It's so beautiful. I had to come back."

With that, he returned me to his chest and hugging him back, I whispered in his ear, "I am so glad to hear it."

I felt like the Grinch at the end of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas"  - my heart grew three sizes that day.

I sat down later with my friend and asked if she had danced with Mr. Shy, and she answered enthusiastically, "Oh yes! That man is going to go far!"  At that, we both giggled and watched him circle around the dance floor, smiling.

Now I look for him at every milonga (and I'm not the only one).

Comments

Stefanie said…
Love this post. Love your writing...I can picture the entire encounter. Very touching. Keep it coming! -Stef
Marika said…
Thank you Stefanie - I'm trying to get caught up! More coming soon (and hopefully pictures too.)

Popular posts from this blog

Tim Ferriss and the Myth of Tango Mastery

Dear tanguero, I feel I should explain my reaction to your comments about Tim Ferriss. It touched a nerve and I didn't really explain my apparent hostility. It was certainly not meant for you. Several people have brought Tim Ferriss to my attention over this past year. I can usually make it a month before his name pops up again. For readers who are unfamiliar with him, he's the author of "The 4 Hour Work Week". He set a Guinness record for the most consecutive tango turns and has competed with his partner, Alicia Monti, at the Tango World Championship . As a social dancer the idea of a tango competition seems absurd. I don't think I will ever understand how something like tango could be judged - or why anyone would want it to be. But I digress. I think the most crucial detail of Ferriss's history, as I relate it to tango, is his winning Wired magazine's "Greatest Self-Promoter of All Time" . If there is any concept more out of synch with social ...

"Proper" Tango Shoes

Periodically someone, usually a man, will be bring up the topic of "proper tango shoes." If he's referring to the problem (and dangers) of trying to dance in flip-flops, or mules, or platform shoes etc., those are definitely valid, and very helpful points to be made. The likelihood of damaging your feet is very high without the proper support of high quality shoes. My problem comes with the idea that the *only* proper tango shoes have 4" stiletto heels on them and fetish-worthy embellishments. (Okay, I'm pretty keen on the embellishments myself.) "goofy ballroomy shoes are a turnoff... get rid of them..." - Alex Tango Fuego (granted this is from 2007), http://alextangofuego.blogspot.com/2007/10/to-dance-or-not-to-dancebrutally.html And, in the comments on a blog post, Anonymous said... " This is a controversial one. If a follower isn't wearing tango shoes then it's usually a good sign she's not particularly good." From Ms. Hedgeh...

Tango solidarity when it counts . . .

Some fellow tanguera-bloggers and I have been having a wonderful online "conversation" via blogs, Twitter, Facebook and email - about the importance of sisterhood and solidarity. You can find Stephanie's post, here and her follow up here , and then Tangocorazon's here . I was so bouyed by the idea of women bonding, helping and supporting each other that I took some things for granted. I took for granted that it would always be easy, enlightened as I am /*cough*/ to be the sort of consistently nurturing and helpful tanguera that I am (in my head) . The truth? Where the rubber met the road (or rather when the discomfort hit the milonga), I wasn't. Here's a little background that gave me a better perspective on the events at the New Year's Eve milonga. These guidelines appear under the heading " Behavior at the Milonga " on Vancouver Island Tango: " . . . The smaller the tango population, the more 'effort' required from each one of th...